I was reminded today of the importance of being tactful.  There are so many ways to say or do the same thing and we have a choice on how we address every situation.

While living in my current home, I have been approached three times with issues.  Each time the issue was legitimate and each time was handled very differently.  I would like to say that I have never been at the center of an issue, but many times I have been at fault without realizing it.  

The first time was shortly after I moved in, my yappy yet incredible little dog was barking.  I had asked the neighbor several times if they could hear the barking or if it was inappropriate.  The answer was always there is no problem.  Inside my home, I don’t hear the barking.  

Six months after I had moved in a different neighbor texted me a beautifully written and funny text asking me not to take my dog out after 9 p.m. due to the yapping.  I was very grateful this neighbor chose to communicate directly to me as opposed to going to the board or the police! 

I politely replied I was sorry, and that I would certainly put the dog on a leash at night and minimize any kind of barking throughout the day.  It was after this text that I was out walking and heard my dog bark.  I completely understood the issue, the yap seemed to get louder as it carried in the distance.  

There were many other things involved as to why this person was sensitive to any kind of barking. But this neighbor was tactful regarding how it was addressed.  I was grateful that I had an opportunity to correct the issue that I did not know existed.  

The second issue arose when I hired a professional to do some outside work.  All of a sudden a very nice couple came pounding at my door and were incredibly angry about their property.  Addressing the issue with me was amazing, the tactfulness of how it was delivered was rather harsh. 

I was mortified and immediately said I would fix the issue.  Before I even got out the door, they were trying to stop the problem themselves.  Fortunately, I had the issue under control in a matter of minutes.  

It was an inconvenience that could’ve been handled with similar words minus the anger and actions.  They had a legitimate issue, but it would have been helpful to have been delivered with more tact.  Thankfully the issue did not affect how we felt about each other as neighbors.  

The third issue that has risen is something that I had been aware of a few years ago and had inquired to the board.  I had done minor upkeep every 3 years, but this simply needed some additional TLC. 

A note from the board was sent to me by email, asking me to kindly give the item some love.  When I read the letter, I of course wished I had dealt with it before it became an issue.  But I was very grateful for the tactfulness of the delivery.

Over these past three years, I have been caring for my parents and have not been out of the house except for necessary appointments.  I don’t think I’ve looked at the item for three years! So saying I am grateful for the subtle nudge is an understatement!

Tactfulness has been on my mind and is a huge part of how we make people feel.  We can address any situation with kindness and love.  Every issue can be addressed with compassion.  

As I move through the holiday season and the new year I continually remind myself to be tactful and approach everything with love.  People remember how we make them feel.

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