The importance of fully understanding the situation at hand is crucial.  Do people understand what I am asking or saying?  Have I been provided the information needed to make an informed decision?  Am I understanding the situation?

Very early on in my career, I was working for a dynamic, strong, smart woman whom I admired greatly.  I had dreams of working in a position such as hers and was very excited to be working for her part-time. 

My first assignment from my boss was to order petit fours for an important event.  For all the right reasons my boss wanted this event to be “perfect” for the person retiring.  It was a big celebration and a big deal.

Google did not exist and I was clueless as to what a petit four was or how to spell the word.  I asked my boss about the petit fours and she simply said that the bakeries would understand.

I called different bakeries for pricing and went with the best price and the best delivery.  When I carried in three enormous boxes for the event my boss looked surprised.

Upon opening the box she did her best to contain her disappointment in me.  The petit fours were very large blocks of cake. It didn’t take me long to understand that a petit four was a petite 1-inch layered cake that was covered in a thin frosting and artistically decorated. 

My inability to deliver proper petit fours was the start of a very tense year of employment.  She trusted the bakeries to give me accurate information and I was clueless.  I did not understand the task but counted on experts to give me the appropriate information.  I now know to cross-reference the information I receive and evaluate the accuracy.  But at that moment I simply did what I was told and believed.    

From then on our relationship struggled.  I went out of my way to build a solid working rapport but failed.  I realized this strong, talented, and very well-regarded woman had misunderstood me and my intentions. 

I had synergistically worked under other strong successful women, so being misunderstood took me by surprise.  It was difficult to work for someone who didn’t appreciate my work ethic, but I believed that working through this challenge would make me a better leader and person. 

To this day I have great admiration for my former boss’s career achievements.  She was a very talented administrator.  I had hoped to gain knowledge from all her strengths to apply to my career.   

Although I feel like I never had a chance to shine in that position, I learned many lifelong lessons.  I still hold this person in high regard.  I understood her frustrations but always wished we had a better understanding of the real issues.

One of the things that I learned was how to swallow my pride and not make any comments about the negative things that were directed toward me.  I never challenged my boss’s thoughts when they were incorrect about me.  I knew in my heart that it would only make things worse.  I prayed daily for improved communications and to stay employed until the end of my contract.

I now take the time to ask the right questions.  Digging deeper to confirm the answers and if necessary asking more questions to gain a true understanding.  I pray for direction and clarification.  

To assume that one knows what’s going on is often a major mistake.  As we hear and see what is going on around us, I am hopeful that we will dig deeper and cross-reference information before forming an opinion.  That we will find out what’s at the root of the question or the problem before making assumptions.  And pray for guidance in leading us to a true understanding of the issue.

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