It takes self-control to conquer evil with good.  Allowing someone to blow off a little steam yet responding with compassion in your voice and nonverbal communication.

Some of the most difficult times for me to respond with love are when I’m caught off guard and tired.  I can handle difficult situations, but when I walk into a tense situation or am involved in something spontaneously, I need muscle memory to help me quickly respond in the desired way.

When thrown into the boxing arena, I want to stay calm and tactical.  I am not an experienced fighter and likely will lose control if I allow myself to be distracted by the anger of others.  Instead, I strive to respond with compassion helping to dissolve tension and eliminate frustration.  

Here is where I find it helpful to have a plan.  It includes both patience and a form of muscle memory.  One of the most important tools I use is to allow myself 10 seconds before responding.  During those 10 seconds, I breathe and attempt to relax my nonverbal communication to show sincerity.  The fake smile won’t work, but compassion in your eyes and genuine interest are key to turning a fight into a discussion.

Throughout my life that 10 seconds has helped me in so many ways.  Sometimes I walk away for 10 seconds and return, but most of the time I just take that 10 seconds to put myself in a place of love.  The best way I know how to put myself in a place of compassion is through prayer.  

I asked Jesus to talk through me and to show me what I need.  Always remembering I have no idea what the person has been through.  Understanding that being right or wrong isn’t important but solving the issue is the goal.  

It is also hard for me to stay focused on compassion if a person starts conflict when my gas tank is empty.  This is when I listen and pray.  It is more difficult to start a fight when someone is listening empathetically.  Words are often misinterpreted when things are tense.  

If the issue goes on for some time, listening is often not enough.  When asked a direct question I do my best not to judge and offer some type of encouragement.  Sometimes evil continues and momentarily depletes my compassion.  

When the situation gets too toxic, I remove myself from the issue.  As I exit the situation I pray thanking Jesus for dwelling within and healing all involved.

Always looking for opportunities to conquer evil with good.     

Click here to stay connected.